Week #20: Team Player

I always get a chuckle whenever people out here in the intertubes decide I'm a republican or a tea party adherent or much of anything else. Apparently everyone wants to be on a "team," and, more to the point, assumes that you're on a "team," too.

It always reminds me of the brain surgeons running around this neck of the woods with Dallas Cowboys crap stuck all over their cars, houses, kids, clothes...I've seen Dallas Cowboys tattoos, for chrissakes. Can you believe that?

I have an overwhelming desire to laugh out loud at them -- they're spending their lives trying to find a way to associate with a bunch of overpaid, under-talented, useless-as-tits-on-a-boar felons, most of whom ought to be in jail. It's precisely the same as being a "Republican" or "Democrat." Why aren't you clowns wearing the colors and logos and tattoos of "Team Price Waterhouse" or vicariously living through the daily stats of the sales guy of the year at the scrappy little organization of "Team Morgan Equity and Acquisitions?"

I have no such drive to be part of "the team." It's probably some sort of defect in the tribal gene everyone else seems to have. The fact of the matter is that I'm usually a bone-deep libertarian in most social issues, and a hard-core conservative in most fiscal ones. But there are a lot of things that are not that easily classifiable. As, for example, my disdain for people who cannot define themselves without group labels.

Ah, well. At least they're easy to spot.

They're the ones who keep labeling you.