Expectations

In my last post, I explained that

(a) my bike; and,
(b) good weather

took priority, albeit only a TEENY priority, over posting here, which explained where I've been. Archer didn't buy it for a second, responding: "You felt so bad about the whole election thing you just HID, that's all, depriving me of a fine opportunity to gloat and strut."

Did not. After it became clear that the choices were a socialist maggot and a BLACK socialist maggot, I just kinda lost interest.

However, I'm beginning to worry about Archer, et al's high expectations of Crown-Prince Mandela al Kennedy de la Obama. Y'all are hereby warned that I shall be merciless when your high expectations (especially those based in faulty belief) turn out to be illusory:



PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
Y'know that "hot" bathroom lingerie shot all the girls are taking for their MySpace page nowadays? It's a trend I'm TOTALLY behind. As a result, I think it's my public duty to help girls who are finally taking the plunge and getting pretty much nekkid in order to be gawked at by total strangers (i.e., me). I mean, so they don't screw it up, y'know? I'm just a nice guy like that.

Therefore, as a public service, here are a couple of pointers to increase the odds of making your Internet-panties debut successful:

1. Get a friend to take the shot so you can get it in focus. (NOTE: I'm available.)
2. Be a redhead.
3. Flush.

Right:
Wrong:

In Our Next Episode: Help for cheerleaders! "Taking a successful "candid" locker-room shot."